Wednesday, October 15, 2008


The Journey of self holds no guarantees.... The mirror reflecting the me I see, deep with in, speaks a truth that creates discomfort to self and others. The prediction of wonder seems normal to all, but is it the truth we live.

With barren sight, alone and afraid, there is no hope in this place where I find myself. There is isolation that is so unbearable but yet become normal. To desire transformation from this arid existence is the daily thought with no obvious clear solution in sight! The darkness pulls over your eyes and into your soul and takes a grip too deep, too intense. You fall and cannot stand up again! Each life whipping, hits you harder and deeper until the bruises seem to no longer heal.

The scars are alive, so alive that your words speak only of them. The eyes speak only of the sadness, and hold no sight of the good and the wonder that surrounds. You have no place with in yourself to go, in each corner of my soul there seems to be a dweller! A dweller that has stayed for too long, PAIN!

As a child has a heart to play and learn, so do I have the desire to see that return with in me? I yearn to dance with glee, to scream with excitement, to feel free from grief and pain…. To feel life as a child who discovers it all for the first, the adventure of all that is new and the awe that remains long after!

Written: After the death of my mother in 2001

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